When Donald Trump won the presidential election in 2016, there were many Twitter posts from celebrities and influencers describing poignant reactions from their young children. The posts were too on-the-nose, and people called bullshit. This time, it’s “Just So” stories purported to have been written by high school girls or teachers.
Turns out Sparky can do this. With his wiggly spine, I didn’t think he could sit up on his butt.
Being a heterodox free-thinker, students would occasionally ask if I believed in conspiracy theories. A group of people colluding on a secret plan to do something sneaky? Sure, conspiracies happen all the time. Of course they meant “conspiracy theories”, like faking the Moon landing or something along that line.
You shouldn’t read any further because I intend to discuss a conspiracy theory.
Sparky shit on his friend, Mr. Moose, but the strength of their friendship has allowed them to move passed their differences.
That’s nice, but I wasn’t going to touch a shitty moose and I sure as hell didn’t want Sparky dragging it around my house. Mr. Moose was washed in the laundry sink, and thrown in the dryer with a load of t-shirts.
Here’s the weird thing. Sparky recognized Mr. Moose in the bottom of the laundry basket. I brought up two baskets of laundry to sort as I watched Youtube. Sparky has no interest in laundry, other than getting to sit on the couch with me.
Mr. Moose was washed with laundry detergent, so smelled like everything else in the basket. Sparky’s situational awareness is greater than I expected. His tail shows his eagerness to be back with his old mate.
I moved the basket to the couch to get a photo of Mr. Moose without Sparky’s head in the way. Even that was a near thing as Sparky ignored all propriety and jumped up on the furniture to supervise the rescue of Moose.
The grey corduroy object, indicated by the red arrow, is Mr. Moose.
I’m not an alcoholic or participant in any 12-step programs, but the Serenity Prayer seems like a broadly useful sentiment.
Representative illustration
Sparky the Brave squared off with a possum1 last night.
We needed to go out just before bed. Sparky wasn’t wearing a collar or leash, but he’d had a big day and was drowsy, so I didn’t think it would be a problem if I kept him on task. Sparky hopped off the deck, headed for the area that passes for his bathroom. I was still on the deck, but 10 feet from him when he spotted the possum in front and to the left. Sparky went to his alert-ready stance.
Have you ever stumbled upon a possum? It’s scary. Possums and raccoons are the bold thugs of the suburbs. It’s like taking an early morning walk in your neighborhood, and passing a couple of guys carrying obviously stolen goods. If you just keep walking, nobody gets hurt. If you want a confrontation, they will stand and fight, rather than cut and run.
I was afraid that if I ran toward Sparky, that would force a decision, and he would bolt and engage. I walked toward him, calling him back. Sparky cautiously approached the possum to figure out what he needed to do.
Sparky isn’t trained, but taught. He knows that I want him to come, but he views it more as a suggestion, rather than a command. He squared off with the possum, but the possum wasn’t running or attacking, so Sparky was circling.
Since the possum wasn’t taking action, Sparky came over to discuss our next move. I snatched him up. Sparky wanted to go back to resolve the situation, but didn’t know how we’d go about that. When I had him, he squirmed a bit, but that seemed performative.
Based on his response, Sparky doesn’t have much experience with possums. If he did, they would be natural competitors. Possums eat ticks. Ticks bring Lyme disease. Sparky likes having Lyme disease because he gets to eat peanut butter. Possums eat other insects, rodents and any other tiny thing. They are also excellent scavengers with a great sense of smell. That is a niche that Sparky enjoys. Although possums look frightening and repulsive, they are good to have around.
1 A possum and an opossum are not the same thing, but colloquially, we call them both possums.
US News: Biden to serve one term.
Top Democrats are trying to figure out what went wrong in the 2024 presidential election. It’s like watching a junkie explain that their problem is anything but the drugs.
I just checked in on the Teachers Forum on Reddit to see how they are holding up after the election. You would need a heart of stone not to laugh at this post.
Reddit: first_time_in_my_teaching_career
This is allegedly from a AP Gov teacher. It is long and fraught, and describes the reaction of students to Trump being elected. Let’s focus on quotes from her students.
So, to give my students the voice they so rightfully deserve; here is a list of quotes from our discussion today.
“He won,and I am terrified. But even if she won, I would still be scared.”- A sophomore girl who had been kicked out after her parents found out she was gay.
“I feel like the people who want to be protectors, are showing women why they have to do everything for themselves.”-A freshman boy,who frequently quotes Andrew Tate.
“I’m sorry Ms… this country has failed you.”- A sophomore boy who I have to gaslight into coming to class.
“I watched my mom hold my baby sister cry Trump won the first time. This morning, she held us both tight crying before she went to work.”-A sophomore girl of a single mother.
“I’m scared.”-Many Students
“Law and Order my ass”-A freshman non-binary student who LOVES playing devils advocate.
“I can’t even make a joke about this. I am so tired Ms… I dont even feel like making jokes.”-A sophomore girl, who I constantly have to tell to stop talking in my class every day.
“Ms…You as a woman have taught me how to be a man. I am so sorry you have to continue teaching about this, basically raising the children of American. And you will never be recognized for it because of your gender.”-A senior boy I had during student teaching, who I fed every single day because his family couldn’t afford to eat.
“Ms…Can I please stay in here today? I just feel safer here.”-A freshman boy who had been bullied for being ‘gay’…he wasn’t gay.
It’s funny because none of this ever happened. It isn’t plausible. Each one is a liberal trope. Somehow, there isn’t a tear-jerker about a girl afraid that Trump is going to cancel her abortion appointment.
The person posting this removed her name after posting. That also indicates that it’s fake.
Most of the comments are of two types.
The first type are the people calling the post “fan fiction” or otherwise indicating it’s completely phony.
The other type, are from other Gov teachers saying that their students didn’t mention the election.
There are several other fantasy posts on Reddit that are similar to this.
It’s nice to see a presidential election that is wrapped up before the bars close. The 2000 Bush-Gore election, with the hanging chads, was so tedious. Just like the Olympics, it makes a difference where you watch. I like Real Clear Politics because they provide all the current information in a clear manner. Watching a news channel on Youtube or cable or broadcast, is so tedious. I’d rather watch a Jerry Lewis Telethon.
The rest of the time, Real Clear Politics aggregates polls from everywhere else and posts articles from a wide spectrum of sources.
This morning, I’m wondering what’s up with the states that can’t close the books on the election?
Prior to the election, here are the states that RCP considered to be battleground states.
Almost half of these battleground states haven’t been called at 7 am. No other states are still up for grabs. That is strange enough to warrant some attention. Here are the
Michigan has 97% of the ballots in, and a 1.9% spread. What’s the hold up?
Arizona has a 5.7% spread, with 63% of the ballots in. That is one of the lowest percentage of votes counted, of all 50 states.
Nevada has a 5.5% spread, with 89% of the ballots in. Surely they could count enough of the votes to call this one.
Sparky wanted to recreate this photo of President Johnson holding his beagle up by the ears. With Sparky’s belly, I’m afraid his ears would come off. I obviously can’t tell him that, so just said that I can’t find my suit.
Sparky wasn’t impressed by LBJ shaking hands with his dog. He thinks Blanco looks like a dumb ass. Sparky is envious and suspicious of dogs with luxurious fur. He likes how his seal fur lets him slide through brush and brambles, and thinks that slick dogs should get more acclaim.
Yuki riding on the back of President Johnson’s Cadillac has the twin virtues of being fun and dangerous. Sparky is going to talk about this photo for weeks.
After seeing President Johnson howling with Yuki, Sparky says that being president seems like a pretty easy job.
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