Author: Richard Nestoff (Page 1 of 55)

 You’d think a guy would be self-conscious if his breath smelled like his poop, but Sparky thinks it’s funny.  I had a colleague at NoRo who thought it was funny to cut a silent, but deadly fart, then call a student up to his desk for a chat.  It’s fine, he was a coach and the student was one of his players.

I was taking a nap when Sparky thought it would be a good prank to hop up on the couch and blow into my face.  I almost gagged.

I don’t know why Sparky’s breath occasionally smells like poop.  He enjoys goose poop, but we don’t have geese here.  In cold weather, like now, Sparky likes to carry a frozen turd in his teeth like a cigar.  I’ve never gotten a photo, but he looks like this.

Sparky hadn’t gone outside in a couple of hours, drank water and played with Mr. Moose.  How can his breath smell like that?

My theory is that Sparky is a tube.  He can pee or poop whenever he wants.  We’ve gone on a walk, he’s taken a big dump, then if the situation requires it, taken another dump 5 minutes later.  Maybe he can fart out of his mouth.  That’s my theory.

With the snow coming down all day, we’ve been hunkering down.  Sparky didn’t even notice when I went down to the garage for an hour to put the snow tires on.  He was happy to lay by the fire, screw around with Mr. Moose, and help me watch Youtube.

When the wind let up, Sparky would surely be eager to bound through the snow, run off some energy and check on all the outside stuff he has to check on.  When we went out for our walk, Sparky put up a good front, but when I started for the bridge, he ran for the house. 

Sparky wants us to revisit the policy about never pooping in the house.  Even with a Carhartt jacket, going outside to poop in the snow doesn’t seem reasonable. 

To be fair, Sparky is cooperating with the policy, but he isn’t convinced.

Señor Piglet has to shed some weight.  When we talked about it, he kept patting my belly and smirking.  I can’t help thinking he was making some kind of point.

Today, Sparky weighs 29.8 lbs.  He was 25.1 lbs on January 18th, 2023, when he moved in.

Blue Buffalo Wilderness High Protein Natural Senior Dry Dog Food recommends 1 1/4 to 1 3/4 cups per day for a 16 to 25 lb dog.  Sparky gets 1 1/3 cups per day, with typically three treats.  He always seems hungry.  We have to try something different.

The first three ingredients in Sparky’s dog food are “deboned chicken”, “chicken meal” and “dried chicken”.  That’s good, but the next four are “oatmeal”, “barley”, “brown rice” and “potatoes”.  Dogs are opportunistic, but that isn’t natural food for dogs.  Sparky needs fewer carbs.

The Blue Buffalo dog food has a bunch of vitamins and minerals, so he needs to keep getting that, but not as much.  We are going to try 2/3 of cup of dog food, and a hard-boiled egg, with half in the morning, and half in the evening.

My eldest sister gave me two stainless steel bowls.  I made a bowl-holder for them.  Sparky’s little breakfast looks quite paltry in the large bowl, so I added two croquet balls.  The balls should slow down his eating and let him scrounge for his food.

The pair of bowls look like this:

Should I add a third croquet ball to further improve Sparky’s dining experience?

Sparky is getting too big for his britches.  Not in the “putting on airs” sense.  I encourage him to be a confident boss.  No, he is just getting too big.  Sparky doesn’t have any britches, but now that I’ve got a sewing machine, if I made him some britches, he mustn’t be splitting the seams.

Sparky gets Blue Buffalo dog food because he likes the wolf on the bag.  I went to the Blue Buffalo website to review the ingredients and nutritional profile.  They have alligator meat listed.  It’s not an ingredient in the flavor Sparky gets, but if I can figure out which recipe has alligator, we might switch to that.

Sparky just told me not to bother.  He isn’t nuts about eating alligator, but wouldn’t mind a pet turtle if I like reptiles so much.  Since I’m looking, he says that a switch to recipe with rabbit or raccoon would be good.