On the way to my buddy’s house, I passed this guy near the Bedford Reservation.

Back in my day, unicycles were for weird kids who lived in developments and didn’t have the manual dexterity to bore people with magic tricks they saw in a book at the library.

Nowadays, that translates to a neuro-divergent incel on a $1600 Inmotion V12 electric monowheel.

The thing has an all-terrain tire, can go up a 45o incline and has a top speed of 37 mph.  It probably is an “exhilarating riding experience”and the guy probably isn’t a neuro-divergent incel. 

I am a little envious, and want to try riding that thing.

That’s not true. 

I want to hide up in a tree fort, and throw apples at him until he falls off or gets away.