When I’ve asked colleagues what they intend to do after they retire, the stock answer is, “Whatever I want!”
That’s a bullshit answer, so I ask follow-up questions. “After eating Ben & Jerry’s ice cream for breakfast, how are you going to spend the rest of the day?”
Retirement is such a foreign concept, people think about it in weird ways, and it’s different than people expect.
One reason retirement is so hard to prepare for is we often lack models of postwork life to emulate, retirees and financial advisers say. Though our culture is awash with images of professional success, we are a little hazier on what retirement success looks like and what it takes to achieve.
As a teacher, it was assumed that I supported the idea of role models, but I really don’t. If a role model is someone to emulate, then a person is limited to what their role model achieved. It makes more sense to have a variety of people that one holds in high esteem. I’m yield to no one in my esteem for American Hero, Chuck Yeager, but I have no interest in being a test pilot. People don’t need role models for retirement because everyone is unique.
People routinely live into their 80’s, most people are familiar with their parents and grandparents, and you don’t get to be the last person to retire from work without knowing a few of the people who preceded you into retirement. Seeing retirement portrayed in TV shows and movies would probably make it worse.
“I would counsel my younger self, and any other active, achieving person to recognize what drives them and what success really means,” said Pilzner.
Retirees frequently don’t realize how much their career provided a sense of identity and self-worth. Many fail to grasp the need to plan for a different source of purpose in retirement, said Betty Wang, a financial adviser in Denver.
Even thinking in terms of success can be an impediment. Success can be viewed as moving up the corporate ladder, while gaining power and prestige. For most people, retirement is the opposite of that. Pilzner is suggesting that it’s important to know one’s self and what brings fulfillment. A sense of purpose, unrelated to accruing money and security, is difficult for some people to find.
I’m an idea man, driven to optimize my life. I like working on projects, so I’ve always tried to make my house, car, technology, and other accoutrements suit me. When I lived in an apartment, I bought a school bus to have something to work on. Now, I’m re-inventing my RV, along with home improvements. That only takes you so far. I could buy more tools, but instead, I borrow tools or work with friends. That puts some social aspect in.
The chimney in my little house was superfluous, and I’ve always wanted it gone. Tearing down the chimney was a hot and grueling project, but in a fun way.
For retirement, I started with a “Friends and Family” plan. Many of my nieces and nephews are getting started with a house and kids, and are busy with their careers. I’ve got skills, so offer to help where I can. My charming niece bought a house just about the time I retired. When she showed me her house, I got the sense that she couldn’t really believe she owned it and was responsible for every little thing. People hate charity, so we came to an arrangement. I’d come over to help her on a project for a day, and the following week, she’d come to my house to help me. That way, I get some help when I need it, and she learns skills and techniques.
David Edmisten, an adviser in Prescott, Ariz., said clients sometimes regret delaying retirement for this reason. The extra years working come at the cost of missing time with family and friends and postponing trips, he said.
“Some even had people close to them pass away and regret not being able to spend more time with their loved ones while they still could,” Edmisten said.
I was lucky. I loved teaching Physics, but the school administration decided to move me out of Physics so that the administrator’s wife could have a solid Physics schedule. When I started at North Royalton, there were four Physics classes and 1 AP Physics. I knew that I’d grow the program, so I shared my curriculum with the young Physics major we’d just hired. Eventually, we grew to five AP Physics and six regular Physics classes.
During the Covid year, I updated my Physics classes, and made high-quality videos for everything. They weren’t perfect, but I’d planned to polish the videos in subsequent years. Since the Covid response in our district devastated academics, Physics enrollment was down the following year. I offered to become a part-time teacher, but administration thought it would be better to assign me to teach a remedial science class, rather than Physics. The remedial students deserve a great course, but that would take me a couple of years to develop. The remedial course would be finished just as I planned to retire. I chose to retire early.
I consider myself lucky because I love teaching Physics and with all the online resources, I’d be more effective with less time needed to tutor students or prepare for class. I had intended to retire at 65, but might have gone longer. It’s possible that I would retire when I could no longer do the job. Had I waited, I may have retired when I could no longer do anything else that I love doing.
By retiring early, I am healthy, relatively vigorous and motivated.
Arthur Parmentier, 69, regrets retiring at 65, rather than working a few more years, partly because he missed out on a few more years of contributions to his retirement account.
The Providence, R.I., resident claimed Social Security at 65, accepting a lower monthly benefit than he would have received by waiting.
“Had I waited two more years or maybe three, I would have been quite comfortable, but right now, I’m living on Social Security and trying not to touch my IRA,” said Parmentier. “I think now that I may live well into my 80s, so I have to be prepared for that and make sure my IRA will last me throughout those years.”
I understand the financial concern, and think that keeps some of my friends from retiring. However, from a vitality standpoint, the years from 65 to 68 are like ten times more precious than from 80 to 83. Some people are made to work. They love it, devoted their life to it, and are interested in little else. In that case, work as long as you can knowing that is your best life.
Being retired is a leap into the unknown. If feels like a decision that can’t be reversed. Some people want to keep hedging their bets, but there is an opportunity cost. It’s possible to secure part-time employment after retiring, but it’s best to have been planning for decades prior to retiring.
It’s a good idea to have no outstanding debt upon retirement. Prior to retirement, move into a house that is manageable and appropriate for retirement, pay it off, buy a retirement car and get every medical issue addressed. With all that in the bag, it’s possible to adjust spending to meet the new budget. Many expenses go down upon retirement. We don’t tend to drive as much or dress as fancy, but we do have time to cook better and do household repairs.
Withdrawing from the 401k is uncomfortable when you’ve spent your life paying in, but that’s what it’s for.
I haven’t thought too much about this, but I may get a “Do Not Resuscitate” tattoo. Watching my mother go from elderly to feeble, I don’t have any interest in extending life beyond a certain point.
Social Security allows people to start their retirement benefits any time between ages 62 and 70, and increases the payment for every month of delay.
For many, the math favors starting at 70, when monthly benefits before cost-of-living adjustments are 76% higher than at 62, according to Laurence Kotlikoff, a Boston University economist.
A person who postpones benefits until age 70 instead of 62 would have to live to at least 80 to come out ahead, said Kotlikoff, founder of MaximizeMySocialSecurity.com, which advises people on claiming decisions.
Waiting eight years to get 76% more sounds like a no-brainer, but that could be eight years following your bliss or eight years dragging ass into the office. Hitting the break-even at 80 years old doesn’t make it sound like a great plan. What are you really going to want to do for fun at 80? Teacher retirement works the same way.
I was lucky to have a clear and distinct reason to retire when it was just feasible. My elder brother is fortunate that his company is restructuring, so that his position is being eliminated just about the time he intended to retire. When that isn’t the case, it’s more difficult to decide it’s time to go.
Big decisions come with risk, but most of us are out of practice. Young adults have to make big decisions all the time. Go to college or go to work, pick a major, pick a college, get married, settle down or pack up and move. They do all that without knowing who they are or much about life. Deciding when to call it quits is a big deal, but it is exciting.