WaPo: Your clothes no longer serve you.

WaPo: Your clothes no longer serve you.

I wouldn’t have thought that an article about a 70 year-old fashion influencer would resonate with me, but here we are.

“I was lost,” Slater, now 70, told The Washington Post.

It’s a feeling that many women have experienced: the anxiety that comes with the realization that your clothes no longer serve you — or the person you’ve become.

“I see my clothes as materials that I use to convey a certain identity, to convey a certain role,” Slater said. Her ensembles communicate her desires, her thoughts and her very soul. 

I wouldn’t go that deep, but everything a person puts on is a deliberate choice.  That makes it entirely fair to judge a person based upon their attire.  

A person who says, “I wear what’s comfortable”, or “I just grabbed something to put on” or “this is just what I wear” is bullshitting.  Not caring is a statement.

Slater found that what her clothing was saying, no longer represented who she is now.

More people should think about that. 

For me, blue jeans are for rough work.  Dockers or other casual trousers are just as comfortable and more suitable for casual wear.  Shorts are for outdoor activities.  Athletic shorts are for the gym.  A pocket t-shirt is for summer outdoor activities, otherwise, something goes over the t-shirt.

“I see my clothes as materials that I use to convey a certain identity, to convey a certain role,” Slater said.

A Hawaiian shirt means you are ready for fun.  A patterned long-sleeve shirt is casual.  A sweater or light fleece is relaxed.

Slater wants readers to know that this is an exciting process, not a mournful one. “I have all the ages I’ve ever been to draw upon [in] thinking about what I might want to wear or even what I might want to do now at this age,” she said. “That’s how I come to the conclusion that being older is an additive process, not a subtractive process the way that many people view it. It’s not about loss. It is a privilege.”

This is where Slater starts making a broader point.  I’ve enjoyed all of the ages I’ve been since becoming an adult.  I don’t think I was sentient until I was 12 or so.  The teen years had a lot of highs and lows, but you make the most of it.

On the last day of school, seniors expect some kind of poignant address.  Some teachers, Mr. Hoover for example, are great at this.  I am hit or miss.  Part of what I’d tell them is:

“You will hear a lot of adults, tell you how they wish they were you.  The whole world is waiting for you.  I don’t.  You know all those wonderful places you could go or interesting things you could do?  I’ve been there and done those things, and I can do it again if I want.”

It was part of a broader point that there is no best stage of life.  Kids are often told that being young, or the college years, are a magical time.  When the person is in that stage, and are fraught with anxiety about big decisions and infinite choice, they can feel like it’s their fault or that they must be doing it wrong.

Adapt to who and where you are, and making the best of it is up to you.

Slater is no stranger to uprooting her life. “I have always been a reinventor,” she said. “I don’t find change as disorienting or upsetting as some people might.”

Bill Clinton campaigned on the stupid idea that change is good.  Change is not good or bad, just inevitable.  Adapt, adjust and exploit the change to your advantage.

“It made me see that change is a normal part of life, that you can’t always control it,” she said. “And that your power really lies in: How are you going to respond when it happens?”

It’s not said often enough that all we can control is what we do and how we respond.

She cited a quote from the artist and former fashion designer Helmut Lang, a hero of hers: “I don’t like to throw things away, but I also have the ability to end chapters of my life.”

That wisdom is why I think Slater is much more than a fashion influencer.